The Primordial

Hello and thank you for playing the game! I'm glad you enjoyed it and took the time to type a well-written and comprehensive review! And please, don't mind being straightforward and forthright with your comments! I very much prefer an honest and sincere review, much like yours, than a sugar-glazed one. I don't want to live in a bubble where the only criticism is honeyed words, therefore your review is very much appreciated! Thank you!

As for your points, please allow me to give my reply to it! 🙂

• The very first H-Scene - To be honest, I initially put it there just so I could have an H-Scene in the first release. I release updates by Chapters and the first update/release doesn't have any H-Scene in it therefore I was pressed to add something to it. It might sound moot, but as the first release and my game's debut, I had to add an H-Scene to it to hook in players. Hence the somewhat out-of-place H-Scene. However... after a few more releases, I have now ever so slightly shoe-horned the first H-Scene with more 'context' and relevance to the story by sprinkling a few details here and there. A few subtle but not-too-subtle details in the scenes if you will lol.
  
  I don't want to spoil too much of it but... if you're curious... I suggest looking/playing through the City Hall path (MC agreed to meet) in Chapter 4, and looking for a painting behind our MC. 😉
   
• The animated cut-ins - These animated scenes aren't really there to give a sense of cinematic (but I do find it extremely pleasing and gratifying that you think so since I worked hard on the animation, sound design, and editing so thank you lol). I mainly add these sorts of animated cut-ins as 'eye candy' to distract/entertain players on scenes with lengthy and/or otherwise boring scenes with walls of text. These animated cut-ins are, by design, not relevant to the story as they are primarily there so that players can have something to look at while the game dumps a wall of text—mainly a minor flashback, trivial premonition, or a simple monologue.
  
  However, I do agree with you that some of the scenes I use are gratuitous, as some other players have pointed out the same, hence I will adjust these scenes accordingly in the future. 🙂
   
• Characters - There absolutely will be more 'serious' and 'less aloof' characters to balance the dynamics of our characters! Or rather... there are already lol. We're very much still in the 'building-up-the-characters' stage of the game. The only 'fleshed out' character so far is Jax, while the other characters are still being introduced to you guys, the players. I very much designed and wrote Ann to be Jax's counterbalance. Ann is to be the straight-woman of the group, the smart and calculating one, who will often be the most tame and sensible. She, and her character,  haven't really been given the chance to shine yet in her own because she's often being dragged along by Jax's shenanigans, and also because I am still building some stuff for our story. However, Ann will start to shine through in this upcoming chapter and the next ones and she will begin to show more of her calm and calculating manner soon. So please look forward to it!
   
• Prose and dialogue - Just as mentioned above, the game is pretty much on its 'building-up-the-characters' stage. I am still building up the world and characters of the game and doing it chapter by chapter. It just happens to be that the first chapters, the chapters we have now, are mainly focused on Jax and her problems. Hence why the story is very energetic and aloof since it's Jax's story being told and the chapters' mood reflects it. As we continue the story, the mood, prose, and dialogue between our characters will also change depending on who's story is being told at the time. It is hard to explain without spoiling the game and blurting out what I have planned but... Chapter 5 will hopefully bring those pieces together and paint my nonsense comments here clearer lol.
   
• Minor things - These points are mostly welcomed since they address things I missed or didn't bother to look back on. Therefore thanks for pointing it out lol! Ann's tutorial at the beginning might be pointless for you and me, and other avid/veteran Ren'Py players, but is essential for newbies. Plus, it also allowed me to point out and demonstrate the Codex feature I (recently) added to the game. As for the MC being dragged along, figuratively and literally, along his various interactions with characters, be they intimate and friendly ones... that will also change soon. Our MC is still grasping what's going on around the new world he's in and therefore has yet to gain proper initiative in many things. Remember, as of Chapter 4, he's only been in the new world for four days, hence why our MC might seem a bit 'passive' at the moment. Once our MC, and by extension, you—the player, gain proper footing (Good/Rude and Character's Love/Sub points) our MC will begin to take initiative.

Once again, I would like to thank you for your honest and very detailed comment! You do not know how important it is to me to have such an honest and well-written review. I am a one-man team with this game as a passion project. Therefore honest and constructive criticism such as yours is what fuels my motivation to strive better and aim higher. Chapter 5 is currently in the works and is about halfway done! I hope you're just as excited as I am for the release! I am working hard on it. Please look forward to it! 😀

Thanks for playing the game! I'm delighted that you liked it! Chapter 5 is currently being worked on, please look forward to it!